I've learnt that I'm broken.
I've been pushed too far to the end, and I've fallen hard.
My mentality is warped, my souls feels like a rape victim,
My body is broken and weary.
I want out.
I want to go home.
I've forgotten what I came here to run away from.
Just as it always does, apathy interrupted my normality (I've actually forgotten what normalcy is).
I don't have proper conversations, I just want to be around someone who makes me laugh.
I'm usually not the talker, or the inventer.
I'm the follower, the listener.
Blinded by apathy, all I want is ignorant contempt.
But there are times I yearn for intelligence;
In me, a reader and researcher is buried deep down.
Now, where are the instructions for excavation?
I have not been faithful to the God I grew up with (the God who was with us in childhood).
I did seem a bit happier when I talked with him.
Where have I cast the shepherd of my soul?
Winter is depression,
Spring is bi-polar,
Summer is manic, anger or rage,
but Fall,
Well, Fall is happiness and contentment.
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